Helping reach someone open to Christ who hasn't actually surrendered to God yet
Helping reach someone open to Christ who hasn't actually surrendered to God yet
Q: My bf said he was going to start following the Lord. He does go to church with me (since this summer; 5 months). But I haven't seen any fruit from it, so our relationship hasn't gotten better. How can I help him come to true saving Faith?
A: It is great you care about him enough to want to see him saved. And you are trying to minister to him, but I think a little bit more guidance can help you.
Remember tho, God is the one who saves, we as messengers and ministers just bring the information to people, and God works to soften, reason with, convict and convert them. Whatever seeds we plant now, may be watered by others long after your relationship ends; not all relationships work out. So just be faithful to God to get equipped well to minister to anyone, and leave the rest to God.
This can help you minister the Gospel to him, to have a true come to Jesus intervention (sharing in love, but seriously). Maybe God used the church info hes been hearing to plant seeds, and this convo will water those truths, to result in soul harvest, (or lead him closer to it ✨️).
1. These essential truths of Christianity are needed to know before he embraces the Gospel, they go hand in hand. Review these with him after church, and ask if he understands agrees with these truths. [If he received these truths, it is diff than belief of, one needs a belief in. But if he agrees with them, it helps you guide to a clear presentation of (and call to) obey the Gospel].
https://www.gotquestions.org/essentials-Christian-faith.html
3. Then go thru the Gospel with him. This has a wording tip, guides to a visual presentation, ....and has a faq section to answer stumbling block issues apologetically (if needed). 👉You want to avoid those rabbit trails as much as possible [avoid prideful intellect] as the conscience is where conviction takes place [causing humility & surrender]. So reroute convos back to the Gospel (his sin and accountability w God, need to get right thru Jesus).
http://believersanswers.blogspot.com/2024/10/how-to-intemtionally-probe-someones.html
2. And these too will be helpful for him (looking at Christianity), and solidify your Faith too ✨️. You can go thru these "after" the Essentials if he has some doubts. "Then" go to the Gospel. So it is a solid robust framework, helping him believe.
http://longertweets.blogspot.com/2022/08/ccc-investigate.html
If hes onboard in #1 you dont need to go thru #2, but it definitely is good to do so as part of discipleship (afterwards), for solidifying reasons. So hes not got those issues as doubts in the future when decievers try to dash his/your faith.
He has to truly surrender to God in humility and realize hes dying to his old self and old life, old desires, old nature, and putting on Christ, the new nature [comes with new righteous desires] to live for Christ, not himself anymore. If he cant count that cost and go get discipled at church, guided by godly men to be the man, father and future husband God wants him to be, then hes not turned to Christ. Yes, new believers grow, stumble and it can take time, but... he would actively pursue it having been radically transformed by God (at salvation). If he professes, he will move out and do right by you and the kids. Then watch over time to see if he truly was saved, or sprung up then withered and left [proving not saved]. Or if its genuine. It can take more than 3 yrs to expose the true fruit, so consider those things. Bith yall need to put boundaries in place, practice self control, pursue holiness, if dating. Even if dating is on pause for discipleship and growth individually, for a few years. You'll see where its going from watching him, and his active long term church involvement, and being mentored closely and outside church, by godly mature men there, who are now priority in his life, shepherding him and replacing his old friends with them. Sin even secret sin and false converts "fake" surface relationships, but genuine grieving frirndships snd submitting to those over you in chyrch, staying accountable, open to and correcting sin from counseling, are guiding indicators of true transformation. Those who are false converts limit relationships hoping to not get exposed till thryre tired if pretending and truth comes out. So keep a discerning eye on this and watch for red flags. While you're being gracious and knowing true believers stumble like toddlers and make mistakes. Perseverance, growth, continually change point to probable salvation.
Check in with his mentors, leadership, Shepherds, disciples, and get their feedback from time to time, as they can help you vet him too as a professing believer.... and person.
This is just a light guidance on the topic.
For resources on dating and boundaries so you can both pursue a holy life, go here.
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