Single parent only godly example for kids
Q: I have concern for my children. They have a father in their life both the stepfather here at home and the bio father who is married and the kids go to their house sometimes. There is no godly influence there. I feel concerned. Should I not let the kids go over there?
A: There are many reasons a family is no longer together under the bio parents. And yoyr situation is one.
The fear is with all the below things that come with the kids influenced by the unsaved side of their family that they might become like them. But you dont need to fear that.
There are many step family and separated situations where mom and dad arent together. Truth is: it could be a blessing that they arent in a cult or false church with conflicting info and that theyd get biblical guidance only from you. It could be a grace from God. Just do your best. And who knows that family could get saved through your influence on them or your kids.
The Concerns:
It results in broken homes, leading to children growing up in two separate households.
One household might teach the child about God, while the other may encourage following worldly desires. This creates conflicting household rules and morals, causing confusion and instability for the child.
The unsaved spouse wildin' out living flagrantly in sin ends up teaching wickedness to their child [as if its the right path; seen by example].
Parents who don't get along often use the child as a pawn to retaliate against each other, leading to significant psychological damage. One parent might badmouth the other or limit their time with the child, fostering resentment and mistrust. In many cases, the father may not be present at all, causing deep hurt and trauma that many adults struggle to overcome even in their old age.
Having a child out of a godly parent home harms the child spiritually and leads them away from righteousness. Includes Stress, can lead to anxiety, acting out, [and if around bad influence and sinful friends] encourage them to manipulatively playing parents to get what they want]. The non mom&dad home situation harms the child (concieved in it) greatly and in many ways. But God can redeem it!
If a solo parent with no other bio parent in the picture: a woman, despite her best efforts, cannot fully teach a boy how to be a man, resulting in many young men today exhibiting feminine traits due to the lack of a strong male role model. Similarly, daughters often grow up with trust issues toward men, carrying their "daddy issues" into their future relationships.
Additional examples of concern include:
- Financial instability: Single parents often face economic hardships, which can lead to stress and limited opportunities for the child. Many single moms do not get child support and those who do don't get enough to provide well.
- Emotional neglect: The single parent might be overwhelmed, leading to less emotional availability and support for the child.
- Behavioral problems: Children from broken homes are statistically more likely to exhibit behavioral issues and struggle academically.
While having a child in your life can bring some of what appears to be a blessing, doing so outside the framework of a godly marriage will lead to lifelong implications for all involved.
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God is in control and reigns soverign. He will work all things out-- in His time, for your lives.
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The Bible does talks about curses. It can be broken; through salvation and living rightly, but is best if both parents are saved and the child gets lead to the Lord. This is difficult to accomplish since you are not in control of salvation. God is. Consider this typical scenario concern: it might be 15 years before the unsaved father comes to Christ. By then the child has already followed in his fathers wicked footsteps into a life of sin. It might be almost impossible for the child/children to be saved. The sin loving child would rebel against attempts to lead him in righteousness [daily training up a child in the Lord] because he is [in deep] in his love for wickedness. This is why godly marriage needs to be sought after from the beginning when looking to date or court. Never get involved with an unsaved man. A godly man will use self control and wait until the marriage night before pursing sex with you. But not all relationships have that perfect situation. And many end up in severed ir unequally yoked situations. Fortunately Scripture provides guidance here.
Do your best, the children will be pulled towards sin since theyre in the sin nature and nit born again yet. They'll gravitate to all things sin including what the other bio blended family has preferences for.
The design or blueprint is to not live in sin and not lead others to sin. Esp not teaching children to sin.
Luke 17:1-2 "Now Jesus said to the disciples, “It is inevitable that temptations to sin will come, but woe to him through whom they come! It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea than for him to cause one of these little ones to sin.”
The wicked teach wickedness instead of righteousness, (which we as image bearers of God are to live in).
His ways are best....sinners trying to justify sin and blame God [who is sinless and rightly just] for being unfair is not repentant attitude. It is a wicked way of thinking. He made us and had a design for us, in sin people go their own way. God knows how we will best thrive, and it is in his design for us which we need so turn and go that way. It is clearly shown in His Word. Remember, "God will not be mocked" and "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom"...He is Holy. We are to be holy too.
Sinners mindsets embrace wicked worldviews. We are to live in biblical righteousness in the Christian worldview.
Lead and raise your children in righteousness as you train them up so its seeds sre buried in their hearts.
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