Afraid to leave bf/gf need advice
Your bf is not going to miraculously "get saved" when you announce you are leaving. He might lie just to try to keep you. Believers are not to be in relationships with unsaved people. Flee that relationship. We are called to not be unequally yoked, commanded by God.
👉We cannot rebelliously willfully enter into such sinful relationships nor continue in one. It puts you in a position of a rebellious person towards God; of non blessing and cuts off your prayers & fellowship to God.
If you are saved God will warn you [such as bring this conviction you had to you, or with this advice here], and then if you dont act He will discipline you to bring you back to the right path (and that can be by loads of problems in life, illness or death if you persist & delay). *He has no use for rebellious servants on earth who do not obey and serve him rightly (as they are called into). He is better off taking you out of this world and using someone else who will be faithful to him.
It does appear you want to follow God, so just do it. Do what is right. Simply actively make an immediate course correction.
Here are some helps to move forward...
Next steps:
Immediate actions
1. You need to have a real convo with him. Preferably when someone else is with you (in the room) so you can safely have the convo. Be honest. If youve been professing to be a believer for a while and living in sin, it would be okay to have as part of the convo "your confession that you either A. Were a false convert who just got right with God, or B. Were living rebelliously in sin but repented of it and are now going to live rightly....
...so now we need a real convo about our relationship & faith." And you can either A. Have a straight up good bye convo if you know theres no way he will hold onto you or turn to God - or B. Have a opportunity for Him to understand true Christianity with an opportunity to obey the Gospel and get saved. It makes sense for option B so he has one final oppprtunity to seriously consider the things of God. Hes only been enjoying living in sin and come this far because he freely had that freely given to him by you which kept you living in sin vs living for God and on the righteous path. If you have a genuine faith convo he might get saved. Dont cling to him if he rejects it tho. Go in peace... & live for God.
2. You need to leave that dwelling place immediately. You cannot live in sin and think you are fine with God.
You should in advance of the convo already prepared/have it set up to move home temp short term till you get settled in your own place. If theres no family or friends who can temp. help you... or you have no money to move on your own (God knows the truth so do not lie)... then...
3. Since you go to church...go ask the pastor to help find a place to stay (immediate need).
>Tell him you fell into sin, moved in with your bf, but sought counsel, have repented and need to move out immediately to obey God to live rightly.
>>Ask him if he can locate any believer (single woman) at church who could temporarily let you stay with them two months so you can get back on track. A contract is needed so do not take advantage of people like unsaved evil people do. Get it notarized the day you arrive to move in. Notaries are mobile and can meet you there. Have the home owner write up a contract with specific timeframes, house rules, and the move out date on there.
>>Optionally or after temp stay...
You might be able to find a room to rent 💵 from a believer at the church for longer, but have it as a lease rental contract signed & notarized, (👉so you do not take advantage of people like unsaved evil people do) possibly have pastor sign it as a witness too, have it include all the rules and requirements, parking rule, noise rules, animals, friends, no bf over, etc as well as rental due date. Have it auto wired from your bank to their acct. so it is always paid on time. And leave elsewhere if there is a situation arising there (to do right to that believer) or upon rental termination.
📍Put an ad out in the church bulletin if needed. Respect boundaries in the home/apt and do not bother them while there. Be a great tenant, grateful for a place to stay.
>> If that doesnt work, which it should... and if you have no money, ask pastor if the church budget funds for temporary help for members to help you for a month or two (used only to find a place to live). And be accountable to God and him by proper usage of that money. Have that money sent to the residence you found (and have proof of the cobtract you show him) so YOU dont touch that money. But only get a place you can afford to pay rent at after that money is gone.
🔖If you need food there help till you are on your feet, see if family can help, or church members take tirns bringing you some food for a short while... or....use the church food pantry for cheap meals or go to a food pantry place for temporary help, or non-religious places where homeless are served free meals.
🔖If you have personal stuff that needs moving out see if church members can help you (when he is not there). It can be dangerous to do this by yourself or while he is there. (Men have murdered people for leaving). Have it stored at your friends or family temporarily, and sell off (by app or yardsale) anything unnecessary so you have funds - and then live minimally.
🏷If you used church money then give back to the church from the second hand sales or from your paycheck to return that money so it is there for another "in need" member. Don't just take stuff and be a bad steward and put other believers in limbo who need that money to help them too.
4. You will fall under church discipline if you dont repent & forsake your sexual sins and forsake them, repent of and forsake your unequally yoked relationship, repent of your living together.
So heed this now and get on the righteous path. Please flee - post haste.
Once you flee....
Make sure you are reading Scripture daily in the morning, obeying what you read, AND attending church and Sunday school classes regularly, and are actively involved in the church.
Remain single. Do not date any man in the future who has not been vetted as a true born again believer. This may involved him meeting the decons and Pastor for true deep probing to see of he is saved and if he is worthy to date or court you.
When you do find someone... Never ever meet at each others place, go away on a overnight trip, or in general go anywhere without a godly chaperone. Focus on dating or courting with the goal of marriage. That way you will only focus on men who are of high godly quality. Theyre interviewing fir the position of a lifetime so vett him really well.
You can find chaperones among the folk at church who are godly mature believers to help you. Create a group chat to see who is avail for times you have need.
Use this single life time to get deep in the Scriptures and grow into maturity of faith. Once you are ready God will bring the right man into your life.
In closing,
People tend to have a low view of God and that is why they sin and live like the world.
You need to learn about God and holiness to have a proper right High view of God so you properly fear him and live out a godly life.
Go through this study once you move out.
Who is God - know His attributes, his character and nature, for a proper understanding of who He is.
Resources for Believers is a wealth of helps to grow you in the faith. And respurces to help prepare you for marriage (in advance).
God bless
*Bookmark this page and go through all of this in the coming weeks and months .
