New believer, but husband has anomicity towards my faith & tries to stop me going to church
Q: I got married 5 years ago, at the time I wasn’t a Christian and neither was my husband. Now I’ve started to return to faith, but I’m finding it hard because my husband thinks it’s dumb to believe in God or go to church or read the Bible. Any time I bring it up I’m told I’m naive, stupid, foolish etc. I know divorce isn’t an option, but what do you do in this situation? I go to church alone but I’m tired of feeling judged when I’m asked why my husband doesn’t come. I’m also tired of fighting every single Sunday about why I want to go to church. We fight before I go, he blows up my phone while I’m there and we fight when I get back. I just don’t know what to do.
A: You have to remain unequally yoked as Scripture says. Live godly, grow more in the faith and live that out in front of him.
Here are helps:
1. Videos you can share (to watch and discuss with him) about God.
2. Share to him this link
3. Share The Gospel clearly presented
Ask if he's ever heard it explained that clearly before. Ask if he he now understands why we need Jesus.
4. Varied answers to his skepticism questions, you can share the link yo any faq he puts forth as objection or question.
5. Resources for your growth 🙂✝️
*Believer - see woman/married
>good to go thru all.
> see asterisk divorce link for clear understanding on the issue of marriage covenant
6. There's good resources in here to help you live in a unequally yoked marriage.
7. Keep praying for Him. Read the Bible every am [where he can see you, (at least 1 chapter a day)]. Be gracious, forgiving, loving towards him increasingly (as you grow in Fruit of the Spirit). Go to Church and be active there without fail. Even if he has no desire for it. [You obey God over man].
If he chooses to leave, let him. God wants you to live in peace as a believer/His child.
Its ok to tell people at church that "you both married unsaved but you were drawn to God and now you are praying for his salvation". Its nothing shameful or to hide over. Church folk pray for those exact things regularly globally. Theres many at church in same situation. Add him to the Sunday School prayer list. And...that info is part of your Faith Testimony. 😊
> if the church people judge you about that, theyre not Christian. Christians love others and care about everyones salvation. Avoid those folks, but if leadership is also doing that... leave & go find a bible focused church immediately. There are false churches so flee those. #5 above has a church search directory.
Let him yell and all that. He's trying to get under your skin and throw tantrums to get his way. Those controlled by Satan do that ... to try to dash your faith and have you give up. 👉Obey God over man. Go to church & be active there (and with future kids). Put your "phone on silent while at church & focus on God". If he fusses say "its uninterrupted time with God and his people". Or make it clear by Text when you get to church this week. And he will know it going foreward (even if he keeps his childish antics up). If he leaves you... let him. Hes probably not going to. [He just wants you living in sin again with him and hating God]. And 😉 at some point he might actually be the one to give in and look into the things of God. If not then 1. Live rightly before home and towards him [showing God changed you], hoping God saves him. 2. Or, let him sever the marriage covenant if he is that adamant about it. It biblically frees you to marry a godly faith-mature man of God.
When you get home, say "Hi. Im home". Give him a kiss. Walk to kitchen and say "You sure missed out today. Such a blessed time at church 😀.... What would you like for lunch today?" Try to defuse him before he gets a chance to complain. Try to be positive from there. If he brings up not being able to reach you. Tell him "if there's an urgent situation he can call (name/911). I'm only there a couple hours... there's been no situations before now, and if there is one - God is soverign and will work it out. 😊"
Avoid verbal rebuttals to his frustration of your faith. Just say things like "I'm sorry you feel that way". "Can I help you understand Christianity by discussing your misconceptions?" "Can I help you understand Christianity by answering things you are confused by?" Things that lead to genuine convos if he is really open. If hes just angry you wont give up your faith to live in sin again just say one of the below. Listed in best escalation order but said positively and kindly:
*"I'm sorry you feel that way.
*"I'm sorry you feel that way. But my faith is part of who I am, and it wont change."
*"I'm sorry you feel that way. But my faith is important to me, and I love God and obey him, and that includes Church on Sunday."
* "I'm sorry you feel that way. But my faith important to me, and since you love me, a loving husband shoulf encourage his wife in good things she wants to do, and even do it with her."
* "I'm sorry you feel that way. I cant change your mind but I hope in the future you will be open to discussing this calmly/joining me at Church."
*"I'm sorry you feel that way. I wish you were more open to consider why my faith matters, and why I hope you come to know God too."
Being kind and truthful but not saying things to add fuel to his fire.
And - Find ways to bless him daily.
Also...You can also put a memory verse on your shared bathroom mirror every day or week. Use it as a way to share the Gospel and God's love with him. He will see it, even if he complains. Just say its your verse for the week.
